threadTALK Blog Series 28: Thoughts of a Stay At Home Dad with Edgar
May 26, 20213 min read
Being a stay at home parent is not what it seems. This month, we had the pleasure of interviewing Edgar, a stay at home dad of two from California. Read more to find out about Edgar's journey, what he thinks about the stigma that surrounds being a stay at home parent, and how he is able to Live In The Moment with his family.
Q Please tell us a little bit about yourself and what you do!
A I am a stay at home dad for my three year old son and my five year old daughter. I used to work in the restaurant industry and owned and managed a small family restaurant when my first daughter was born. The hours and workload were too much and prevented me from spending adequate time with my family and newborn daughter. When she was almost one year old, I sold the business. I was going to transition into a new career, but my wife suggested I take some time off before deciding next steps since she was going back to work soon. However, I never went back to work because the stay at home role was working so well for our family, and I've been a stay at home dad ever since!
Q What would you say are common misconceptions about being a stay-at-home dad and how do you respond to it?
A I think there are two main misconceptions about being a stay at home parent. The first applies to both moms and dads, and suggests that stay at home parents aren't working and that it's easy. One person suggested to me that all you have to do is play with kids all day - I wish it was that easy! Trust me, it takes a lot of patience and work, but it's the best job in the world! The other misconception I think applies to dads only. There is this misconception that dads don't really know what they're doing when taking care of the kids and I just don't think that's true, at least in our home. There are things that only Mom can do and there are things that Dad excels at - together we are a team and my children benefit from both of our strengths.
QIf you have to pick one trait you need in order to become a successful stay-at-home parent, what would that be and why?
A While there are many traits needed to be a good stay at home parent, and a good parent, I think the most essential trait would be patience. Some days are long and hard and others are so fun they fly by so quickly, but on the hard days, you absolutely need calm and patience.
Q What are some things you wish you knew before becoming a stay at home parent? Any advice you have to give to new parents?
A When I became a stay at home dad, I wish someone had told me how fast it goes. It truly just goes by so fast, and you can see time pass by as these little ones grow so quickly. My advice to any new parent is to just live in the moment, and to be present.
Q Do you see yourself being a stay at home dad forever, or do you plan on making changes once your kids get a little older?
A Once my kids are in school, I plan to go back to work.
QWhat are some of your favorite daddy moments?
AThere are so many. I think anytime I teach them something new and see them using and applying their new skill, that is very gratifying. Also, just being witness to all their "firsts" - the first time they walked, or the first time my daughter learned to spell her name, or the first time my son could reach the door knob - there are so many both small and big moments that I've been able to be present for and I'm really grateful for that.
Q Lastly, if you were to describe your life story in one word or phrase, what would it be and why?